Jess thought that was a great idea. Now that she was sure of Mike's intentions—oh if only she knew—she actually sounded sincere when she said she wished I would go to the dance. I gave her my Seattle excuse.
After I hung up, I tried to concentrate on dinner—boiling the beans, flapping the tortillas, stewing the stuff and especially dicing the chicken; I didn't want to take another trip to the emergency room. I'd already had one too many.
But my head was spinning, trying to analyze every word Fredward had spoken today. What did he mean, it was better if we weren't friends? Not even lovers: friends. My stomach twisted when I realized what he must have meant. He must see how absorbed I was by him; he must not want to lead me on... so we couldn't even be friends... because he wasn't interested in me at all.
Of course he wasn't interested in me. I wasn't even interested in me, I thought angrily, my eyes stinging with rage-filled tears—a delayed reaction to the onions, I tried to tell myself. I wasn't interesting and he was. Interesting... and brilliant... and mysterious... and perfect... and beautiful... and rich... and continental... and possibly able to lift full-sized vans with one hand... and...
Well, that was fine. I could leave him alone. No, I would leave him alone. I would get through my self-imposed sentence here in purgatory, and then hopefully some school in the Southwest, or possibly the tropical country of Hawaii,110 would offer me a scholarship. I focused my thoughts on sunny beaches and palm trees as I finished the enchiladas and put them in the oven.111
Charlie seemed suspicious when he came home and smelled the green peppers. I couldn't blame him—the closest edible Mexican food was probably in southern
110. The 50th state to join the union. Famous for its pineapples, surfboards and hang-loose attitude.
111. It is important to note that the protagonist, Bella, enjoys the sun.