threw a fit. When I was finished with my fit, I went looking for you at the bookstore I saw in her head. I could tell that you hadn't gone in, and that you'd gone... south. And I knew you would have to turn around soon. So I was just waiting for you, hanging out, randomly searching through the thoughts of people on the street, like browsing fashion magazines at a checkout stand, real casual, to see if anyone had noticed you so that I would know where you were. I had no reason to be worried... but I was strangely anxious... " He was lost in thought, probably reminiscing, staring past me, seeing things I couldn't imagine...
"I started to drive my Volvo in very tight circles, still... listening. The sun was finally setting, and the Volvo was getting low on gas, so I was about to get out and follow you on foot. And then— " He stopped, clenching his teeth together in sudden fury. He made an effort to calm himself. "There there, Fredward," he whispered, probably hoping I couldn't hear him, fearing that I would laugh. "There there."
I wouldn't have laughed.
"Then what?" I whispered. He continued to stare over my head.
"I heard what they were thinking," he growled, tossing his head back, his upper lip curling slightly back over his teeth. "I saw your face in his mind." He suddenly leaned forward, one elbow appearing on the table, his hand covering his eyes. The movement was so swift it startled me. "I saw more than your face in his mind, Bella. It was very... hard—you can't imagine how hard... for me to take you away, and leave them... alive." His voice was muffled by his arm. I think he was sobbing. "I could have let you go with Jessica and Angela, but I was afraid if you left me alone, I would go looking for them," he admitted in a whisper. "I am just so protective of you, Bella. And you get into so much trouble, and most of it isn't even your fault. It's like the world is against you, Bella, and I can't stand it... "
I sat quietly, dazed, my thoughts incoherent. My hands were folded in my lap, and I was leaning weakly against the back of the seat. He still had his face in his enormous left hand, and

177

Chapter 8

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