"Does the Pope hate fags?"329 I chortled. "No, I'll eat at the airport." I was very calm, too. I went to the bathroom to shower. Almost as if I were borrowing Jasper's strange extra sense, I could feel Alice's wild—though well-concealed—desperation to have me out of the room, to be alone with Jasper so she could tell him that they were doing something wrong, that maybe in the eyes of the Lord they shouldn't be doing this, that they were going to fail...
I got ready methodically, concentrating on each little task. I let my hair down, swirling it around me, covering my face with it. The peaceful mood Jasper created worked its way through my brain and helped me think clearly. I grabbed a hairbrush and sang "Fantasy"330 to myself in the mirror while I planned. By the time I forgot the rest of the lyrics, I had it all worked out. I dug through my bag until I found my dirty sock full of nugs. I emptied it into my pocket.
I was anxious to get to the airport, and glad when we left by seven. I sat alone this time in the back of the dark car. Alice leaned against the door, her face toward Jasper but shooting me glances from behind her sunglasses every few seconds. As if I would just roll out the car while it was still moving; get a life, Alice.
"Alice?" I asked.
She was wary. "Yes?"
"How does it work? How are you so cool?" I stared out the side window and my voice sounded dreamy. "Fredward said it wasn't definite... that you weren't always cool." It was harder than I would have thought to say his name. That must have been what alerted Jasper, why a fresh wave of serenity filled the car.
"Yes, things change... ," she murmured. "Some people are more cool than others... like the weather. It's hard to be cool. I'm only really cool when I'm not trying to be, you know? Once I change what I'm
329. It is unclear what Pope Benedict XVI's current stance on homosexual persons is. Prior to his election as Pope, Benedict twice cosigned letters in 1986 and 1992 that said that, while the homosexual inclination itself is not a sin, "it is a more or less strong tendency ordered toward an intrinsic moral evil; and thus the inclination itself must be seen as an objective disorder." Since his 2005 election, Benedict has avoided speaking on the issue altogether.
330. Mariah Carey, 1995